Self-care isn’t selfish

When we picture someone selfish, we imagine someone who always puts themselves first no matter what and allows their ego-driven existence to rule themselves and all around them. Some people view any type of putting oneself first as selfish though, and I think that’s incorrect.

As the saying goes, ‘you cannot pour from an empty cup’. There is a ‘good type of selfish’, better named, self-care. This is about taking the time away from life’s demands when you feel depleted, about filling yourself up with the things that feed your soul. When you let your cup fill by being kind to yourself, it will start to overflow and affect all others you encounter in positive ways.

If you are happy and fulfilled and you keep your cup full, you cannot help but walk around feeling good and projecting that; others around you will also be able to share in your joy of living.

I know when I’m run into the ground and depleted from trying to be everything to everybody, I end up grumpy and tired, with very little to offer anyone else! It makes more sense to me to make sure that my needs are met before I can meet the needs of others – not my wants, but my needs. I need to eat well, I need time to relax, I need to treat myself as someone I love, I need to feed my soul.

When you have filled your own cup, without even trying, you will lift other people up and people will want to be around you. You will thrive in everything that you give your attention to and life will be in balance. Take time to fill your cup – as soon as you feel it draining; self-care is not a selfish thing, in the act of caring for ourselves, we become able to care for others and truly flourish.

– Tamsin Bunn